Getting to know Mbale

Today was a pretty good day. Last night I couldn't sleep at all so I snuck off to the kitchen and facetimed  with my family and then with Sammi. It was super fun to hear familiar voices. So there was a silver lining to my insomnia. Then I got up at 9 and got ready for the day. 

                           

                              (This is Katie, she just got here too and is adorable!) 

One of the girls, Katie (different than mentioned above) took us to Mbale downtown. We walked around and tried to get a feel for the city. It is pretty big city and there are so many people all standing around chatting. There are security guards outside of many of the establishments. So when you go into the grocery store you have to get scanned and your bags are checked.  The best things is that the security guards are so nice. They always wave and chat with us. They are the friendliness people I have met so far! 

We went to the new and improved market. The old market was on the side of the road and there were stalls all over the place. It was really dirty and not very sanitary. The new market is in a huge cement four story building. The vendors rent space and they set up shop with whatever. Food, clothes, shoes, and tons more. There are so many vendors. This new market is so much better than the old because the vendors can leave all their product locked up over night. Plus it is much more clean because it is inside and not on a dusty road. 

After the market we walked around, went to the bank, and headed home. 

      

        

                                                (This is our road! Isn't it beautiful!!!!) 

After some training with Jess, lunch, and a nap I went with Whitney to a soccer league that HELP is assisting with. It was amazing. They introduced me to all the kids, but they could not say my name at all. It was so funny, they all yelled out different things. Haha They only have two soccer balls and tons of children, so we split into boys and girls and started drills. We practiced heading, kicking, weaving, and just having fun! All the kids were so excited to play and most of them were WAY better than me. Haha I wish that Sterling was here to hep me out! ;) 

     

I just love the children! They are so sweet and they love to hold my hand while we walk. I started running while holding two girls hands then I stopped suddenly. They giggled and giggled! I love how much joy they find in the simple fun things in life. They are so joyful! It is so humbling! 

We headed home on botas and had dinner. Tonight we had chicken stew. You might not think this is as interesting as I do, but you have to read it anyway. Chicken stew is chicken and sweet potatoes in a broth. But here is the thing...African sweet potatoes are actually potatoes that are sweet. They are not at all like sweet potatoes in America. I love them, because they are actually what I always thought sweet potatoes should be! It tasted sooooo good to me probably because I am hungry all the time. ;)

 

     

After dinner we had to dishes in a bucket because the water was out. 

                               

First Day in Uganda

Okay so I am offically in the house. The trip was pretty uneventful, thank goodness. I am super tired and I am stoked for sleep tonight. Amsterdam was wonderful and I actually ran into a friend. Can you even believe that? A friend of a freind was on my flight from Hoouston to Amsterdam, but we didn't make the connection until after while we were getting off the plane. She walked and talked with me for about an hour, which was really wonderful! It was seriously wonderful to chat with someone that I knew. Then I walked around and loked at things. 

The flght to Uganda was long and I was really really tired. Finally I got to Ugagnda and Jess was there just like she promised. I was so relieved! We slept in Entebbe and the next morning we headed out to Mbale. It was a crazy bus ride.  There is no personal space in Uganda and some people are really excited to help a white person. Jess and I were the only white people for miles. This one guy keep trying to get me to try a bunch of foodie others tried to teach me their native language. I am horrible, but I have only been here for a day. 

When we got off the bus in Mbale the people stormed to drive us home. Jess told me that all the drivers want to drive the white people and boy howdy she was right. People were pulling at me and talking so fast in Luganda. So Jess helped me out and off we went. Here is the scoop, there are is a huge employment deficit. So tons of men wait around to drive you wherever from point a to point b on a dirt bike. Jess was on one with my luggage and I was on another. My driver was suppose to follow Jess, but we got separated. He didn't remember which bank we were going to and I hadn't even heard that part of the instructions. So using the four directions that Jess gave me to get to the house I directed him to take me to the home. After ten minutes, asking directions from three little kids, and totally over paying him I was left on the side of the road alone in Uganda. No one speaks English and I really didn't know where else to go. I was freakin out a little bit, but I figured that if I just stayed on the road Jess would eventually find me. I walked around and some little kids rushed me. They all wanted a hug and I was happy to oblige. While I was standing there waiting two white college age girls rode up on dirt bikes and I knew I had found my place. Thank goodness! 

Now I have been introduced to everyone and am really really excited for sleep!!! It is beautiful here and I think I am addicted to the pinapple. 

Let the adventures begin!

I just wanted to type up a quick little post while I am in the airport. I got here way early, mostly because I am my Father's daughter. It took 5 minutes to check my bag and another 15 to get through security. I am confident that it isn't always that easy but I am counting all my blessings! You might have wondered why I haven't posted in a while, guilt. I have some weird guilt complex. I feel guilty sbout a ton of things. I still feel guilty that I hit Jordan Blanchard in the face with a dodgeball in the 6th grade. Anyway I was feeling really guilty that I would add to the comparison problem that we have in our world. 

I hate flipping through Facebook and feeling like everyone on earth is having more fun than I am, so as I prepared for my trip I really wanted to talk about comparing. However, I felt like I was breaking some rules by going to Africa. Hahah but that isn't the answer. The answer is perspective. I don't think that I can eradicate comparison from the world (as much as I would LOVE to). We need to compare things, but we don't need to compare people. Don't compare your life to someone else's. And I beg of you, please don't compare your life to someone's Facebook life. Remember that you have 300 frerinds on Facebook and the 20 that are doing exciting things are posting. Everyone else is flipping through and like them all. The whole pong of Facebook is to compile all the noteworthy things in our lives and share them. So naturally it looks like everyone is doing cool things because they aren't posting the boring, normal, or mundane things. They are finding filters and angles that make their experiances look even more wonderful! But to be fair we should all post normal things too just ton remind everyone that we don't do major things all the time.  Have fun in life and don't stress about what other people are doing. Make memories and don't worry about the price tag. Make lots of memories with loads of wonderful people! I just love you, you beautiful people! Now my next post will be from Uganda! Ahhhhh! 

Just in case you didn't know where it is, here is the giant map with a giant sign! Hahaha I don't know why but I love this map a lot! 

I know this was short but I just wanted to personally talk to all of you. Since that is not possible, a post was needed! 

Facebook and iMessage is available! 

This week, clear out your social media. Social media is awesome, it allows me to stay up with all of y'all. But if you struggle with comparing your life to those posts you see on Facebook, clear yours out. 

     What was I thinking?!?

That I love Africa!!! 

Let's be best friends!!!

Okay the next thing that I really think has had an impact of my self confidence was my friends. I am not going to spend your valuable time to write out every person that I have ever called friend. It is just too ridiculous and I am not going to go on and on about the people that I love. Plus I wouldn't be able to talk about everyone and that really stinks. I have wonderful friends. I feel so blessed to have such great friends. Now that I have told you what I am not going to do, how about I tell you the game plan. Let's talk about some of the stages of friendship and the things that I have learned from my friends. 

I have had a lot of friends in my life. Some of them have come and gone. Most of them will always be my friends. No matter how far apart we are we will always be friends! 

During the early years of school I had a lot of friends come in and out of my life. I jumped in and out of friend groups week to week. A group of girls in my 5rd grade class started burn books. I quickly Aline's myself with a group of girls that did not participate. I thought that was pretty horrid so I started writing down nice things about people and the rest of the girls followed suit.  Man it was a mess for a few months. Everyone was trying to find out what was written in the burn books. On the other hand, we openly told people what we had written. It was nice and everyone enjoyed hearing the positive things we noticed. When our teacher found out about the books I still got called down the the principal's office and had to show my book and what was written. The others girls got in trouble and I got a stuffed whale! From these friends I learned that I wanted to be friends with nice people. Even if it isn't popular it always wins out in the end. Be nice! 

In middle school, I joined a group of friends. It was decided that pony tails were too preppy and skater shoes were the only proper attire allowed for our friends. Hahaha Now I have always had a tendency towards skater shoes because honestly they are super comfy and I just like them.  However these weren't really long lasting friends because the friendship was based off of shoe choices. I didn't know them and they didn't know me. Which is super sad. We were situational friends. All of us in this group didn't fit the "norm" and thus we sought safety with each other. Truly the idea of a norm is total hogwash, but I didn't know that then. 

From these friends I realized that I didn't want to limit myself. I didn't want to belong to any group that gave qualifications and I just like to be myself. Skater shoes and all! ;) 

(Totally had a pair of these! Loved them!) 

I spent alot of time in high school telling my friends no. No let's don't do that...because it is a bad idea. No I don't want to. No...no...no. Looking back there were a few times that my Motherly instinct was helpful and stop us from just wasting time and money on things that were really dumb, but mostly I was probably annoying. 

Be smart. Don't do anything that is dangerous, but don't be that person that is so worried about everything that you won't do anything. It is a balance for sure, but it is worth finding. Once we were having a sleep over and we decided to look at the stars from the roof of my friends bedroom. We all climbed out and sat on the roof. I was cold and I asked for someone to grab my socks. One girl was still in the room, she grabbed a pair of socks and tossed then out to me. I didn't catch them...they fell off the roof on to the ground. hahaha We go caught on the roof, because of those socks. Dang socks! It was hilarious! 

The other thing I learned during this period is expressed well by owl city and Carley Rae Jepson "we don't ever have to try, it's always a good time". I spend hours and hours with these people doing all kinds of things that shouldn't be fun, but there were. We had "slipper fights" which is pretty much what it sounds like. You just kind of slap at each other with slippers. I have no idea how this came to be but it was so funny! I went to prom with some of these friends. We spent about 20 minutes at the dance then  bailed. We went home and made pudding, played apples to apples, and joked around for hours! It was awesome. It was so fun and it only mattered that we were all together having a good time. It doesn't matter how long we are apart when we get together things are always fun!

The most important thing I have learned is to open up. When I left for college I went alone. My Dad dropped me off at the airport, hugged me, and said "go to class and don't talk to boys". Haha I was nervous. I didn't have any friends, but I kept telling myself I would find some fiends. Well I did! They have made all the difference in my college career. We have pretty much done everything together and have made tons of memories. At first we were good friends because we were all in the same situations, but soon we started to open up to each other. We started to talk and talk about real things. All of the people that have influenced my life have done so because they were willing to share parts of their soul with me and I likewise shared with them. Don't be afraid to open up and let people see your struggles. It will bring you closer together!  I just love you people! Have a lovely day/weekend/year/life! Thank you for being my friends! We couldn't do this alone! 

Here is my challenge this week, reach out to someone who has touched your life! 

Practice makes progress!

I have found that everything in life takes practice. How do we learn how to walk and talk? We practice. How do we learn how to play instruments, gain muscle, or juggle? We practice. Self-esteem is the same way. We must practice. The absolute best advice I will ever be able to give is to sit down, write out some ways to be more kind and understanding for yourself and others, and then practice. Practice makes perfect. I had a French teacher in middle school that said "perfect practice makes perfect". She said that it doesn't do any good to practice if you are never going to improve. I agree with her, but I also don't agree. I agree that while we practice we must find ways to improve. If we do not we will never progress, but I do not believe that one can be perfect. This implies that you has no room to improve, that you have reached the absolute best. What does that even mean? Does it exist? I have been practicing for an interview at a new job. Could I ever have a perfect interview? Without any hesitation, cockiness, fear, or wrong answers. I don't think so. Anyway, it isn't worth worrying about. Practice makes progress! That is what we are going for people, progress.


                                   (Found http://www.newmanagement.com/tips/images/sign8.jpg)

I totally thought I made this phrase up, but then I typed it into google...yeah I wasn't the first. C'est la vie! 

When I was younger I practiced liking myself. I would take time each day to remind myself about something that I liked about myself or that I was good at. I can say with confidence now that I am awesome and I like myself, because I have practiced. It seems silly to say, but this is what it takes. It takes reminders, sticky notes, phone alerts, and time. I have been known to have my phone remind me to write down something I like about myself. There is no shame in that! Put a sticky note on the bathroom mirror saying, "You are beautiful! You are enough! You are doing great!" 

Sit down and write one way to improve your self-esteem. Everyone will have different problem areas. One thing that I am working on is self deprecation. Let's be honest, I use humor to dispel awkward moments. Often the humor I use can be in a negative manner towards myself, because in my mind this will make the other person smile, forget their troubles, or feel better. It works...sometimes...not really...mostly it just makes things more awkward...so...yeah. No the best idea and I am working on it. I am practicing attention. I am trying to pay attention to the thoughts that enter my mind before I open my mouth. Then before I open my mouth I can decide whether this comment is helpful or hurtful to anyone including myself. I am no expert, but it gets easier with time. 

      (Found http://blog.livlane.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/You-Are-Enough-with-URL-700x466.jpg)

Another thing that most people should work on is negative thinking. Let's be more positive. Now I don't want us all to ignore reality and expect everything to be chocolate and candy canes, but let's work on being more positive. Where do you think this comes into play for you? What area of your life could use a little more positivity? When you start to tell yourself that everything is going wrong and that nothing ever goes your way...stop. I know that sounds way too easy and it is easier said that done, but if you make a goal and set reminders to stop and think about the reality of the situation, you will be able to stop the negative thinking. Here is an example...many college students stress out about exams. If I do poorly on this exam I will fail the class. If I fail the class I will not have good grades. If I do not have good grades I will not be able to get into grad school or get a good job. If I don't get a good job I will be poor and unhappy. Therefore the stress I was feeling about this exam has amplified, because according to this way of thinking I must to well on this exam to get a good job and have a happy life. This is what we call black and white thinking. Things are either wonderful or catastrophic. This gets us no where and it tweaks reality. In reality if I do not do well I will probably be able to get a decent grade in my class if I put in effort and it probably won't effect my future job or happiness. However you may have read through that and realized that this is something you do often. In fact it is very common. It is also very debilitating. Don't let small things get you down.

                      But if you do actually have catastrophe strike I hope you are as calm as this fellow. 

So stop it! Hahaha really though make a goal and set reminders to consciously think about the pathway of your thoughts. Make judgement calls based on reality. You can't ignore stressors, life is full of them. Most of which we must address, but don't blow it all out of proportion and cause enormous stress levels.

We will talk more about stress, because I have lots to say about it (since I took an entire class on stress management and it pretty much changed my life...however I am still managing my stress day to day through PRACTICE!)

This week set an alarm on your phone twice a day. Set some fun ring tone and practice boosting your self-esteem. my alarm goes off and reminds me that I am doing my best. Not only do I love having my phone give me positive feedback I also am reminded to work hard to make that statement true. You are enough! You are beautiful! Go and live you beautiful people you!

I have no more crashes to report, and for that I am grateful. I am however spending lots of time on my bike exploring Houston.    

  

Books, glorious books...

I know that it isn't aways apparent, but I started blogging to try to work through my own thoughts and memories. I wanted to create some mathematical equation that would equal positive self-esteem. It seemed that everything would fall into place and it would become clear as I wrote everything out, but the truth is that every life is different. My experiences are not the end all be all but I hope that they have helped you in some way. I have tried to be a reminder that you are enough! You are beautiful and you are loved! 

Moving on with time line of my life and experiences, I find it fitting that the next thing on my list is literature. I decided a few weeks ago that I would reread the Harry Potter books. I just put down the 5th one and after I wiped away the tears I remembered that I needed to type this up. 

      Found on: parade.condenast.com

Books have always been a part of my life. Both of my parents love to read and we read as a family often. I remember Dean reading The Chronicles of Narnia out loud to Melanie, Trevor, and me when I was about 7. I remember the fascination I felt as he made the world of C.S. Lewis come alive. We read scriptures as a family every evening and although sometimes I pretended to be asleep so I wouldn't have to take my turn I learned to love those words as well. 

I have forever been grateful to the people that taught me how to read. In 1st grade my teacher kept me in at recess to help me learn how to read. Sounding out the words was hard for me and I didn't take the time to do it well so learning to read smoothly was hard for me, but my teacher was determined to help me if I was willing to work at little extra. So I stayed in at recess and sometimes after school to work on reading. My parents helped my find books that were interesting so that I would want to read. 

I loved the Ramona books and they made me feel like a pretty awesome child. I was no where near as crazy as Ramona. I loved reading the stories about Br'er Rabbit and that gang. I totally understood the desire for adventure that Jamie and Claudia felt in the Mixed-up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler. Since reading that book I have longed to run off and live in the Metropolitan Museum of Art for a few days just to see if I could do it. One summer I decided that I would learn new things and I would write them down and file them in a way that only I would understand. It work for Mrs. Frankweiler, but to be perfectly honest I didn't remember where I had filed anything...so yeah...not my best idea. 

         Found: m.memegenerator.net

As my love for literature grew I became better friends with the librarians. They helped me find books that opened my eyes to worlds outside my own. I cried and cried while reading the Island of the Blue Dolphins, but it taught me about loyalty and courage. I read Number the Stars and caught a small glimpse of life in occupied Poland during WWII. I recognized that fear and hatred are a dangerous and deadly combination and that understanding the lives of others will help us to avoid fear. I read the Giver and Gathering Blue which taught me to cherish my experiences the good and the bad.  

When my Grandfather died I looked to my bookshelf and pulled out Anne of Green Gables. I ran through the familiar pages until the end when Mathew dies. Anne and I comforted one another as the reality set in. 

I was positive that Jo from Little Woman and I were the same person, and yet hoping against hope that I wasn't Beth. If I was Beth then it must mean that I would die young, because obviously that is what happens to everyone who is sweet and selfless.

I read hundreds of books (once I tried to make a list of every book I had ever read after writing down about 900 titles I gave up because it was cutting into reading time). Each one showed me that I was not alone. I was not the only girl in the world who ever felt friendless or lost. As I grew, they grew with me. My friends that would never leave me. Books showed me that I am not alone and I am also not the center of the universe. Other people have problems and struggles. We all just do the best with what we are given. 

I could go on for ages about the wonderful books that I have read. Millions of things I have learn from authors. If you knew how many days I have spent reading you might worry about my social skills but rest assured I also like people!  :) Books helped me see what things I liked in people and the characteristics I wanted to develop in myself. Some taught me that I can go hard things, other taught me that I don't have to do them alone. Some just made me smile! Oh, the wonderful things you find in books. 

I have felt that my books are on my side, helping me see the world and also myself in a positive light! As I finished reading the 5th Harry Potter book this quote was a beautiful representation of how I feel about my books.

"He somehow could not find the words to tell them what it meant to him, to see them all ranged there, on his side."

 You can call me cheesy that is fine by me. I just love books! 

What book has influenced you the most and why? 

Adventure is Out There

I am back y'all! I am sorry that I abandoned you to other internet distractions, but never fear I am back and ready to write once again. It has been a crazy month. Finals, finals, and more finals! Then packing, driving (26 hours with my parents...yikes! hahaha just kidding it was awesome), settling in to a new job and lifestyle. Since that we have had many adventures.

Ten days ago, Sharon and I were going for our morning bike ride when the planets aligned for a small catastrophe and Sharon ended the morning in the ER getting 11 stitches in her chin. I was feeling pretty bad, maybe I could have done something different to change the situation. However, this train of thought got me nowhere and it didn't change anything. After a good nap and some food, we both started to feel like this was a pretty awesome adventure. We had taken a risk (which is pretty much the choice we make as we walk out the front door, or come to think of it even if we never leave...life is just plain risky) and we came back bruised, broken, and scarred but we came back! We saw some beautiful things along the ride! We met some great nurses and doctors. Sharon showed her boys how to be brave, strong, and face some real fears.

This morning, we went on our first bike ride since the crash and we made it! I witnessed a sunrise that was glorious and the cranes that lined the lake edge were the only others to witness the beauty. Sharon did a hard thing this morning! I was pretty terrified too (not to mention that everyone we talked to about the crash told some horrible story about someone dying...so yeah...that was helpful!) but we did it and we will ride again! 

While I was riding I was thinking about the adventures I have had in my life. Some of them were planned, some were hoped for, and others hit me in the face completely unexpected (this one is most common since I do have a tendency to fall off of things). A while back I wrote my best friend who was on a mission for our church in Las Vegas, NV. I explained that my new goal was to have an adventure each day of my life. Many days have passes since then and I have had many adventures. I am excited for the many more that are to come. Since writing that letter to Taylor I have hiked mountains, watched dolphins swim, passed some finals, made new friends, gotten lost, admitted fault, played finger puppets, and given lots of hugs. Adventure is out there! Trust me, I know what I'm talking about.

(Picture found here.)

I want to challenge you to see the daily adventures in your life. Even the day that "shower" is only thing that gets done from your to-do-list, find the adventure! Help others find the adventures and live their dreams! 

In July I planning an adventure to Uganda. I am volunteering with Help International in a small community in Uganda. I will be teaching, building, and making a ton of new friends. I am so excited, and although this adventure has taken the most amount of planning so far you don't have to fly thousands of miles to find adventure. The real adventure that I look forward to is possibly making a difference in a small number of people. You can do this too! Join me in the adventure of a lifetime as we focus on loving and supporting the people we come in contact with! I have a great opportunity to travel to a place I have been kind of obsessed with since I decided that giraffes are the best animals ever and I am so excited! I get to plan my own project, all my own! So, of course, I will e focusing on development of healthy body image and self esteem! Seriously, did you even have to guess? :) 

My project will help young girls develop the know how and confidence to make tough decisions that will benefit their futures. Many young women in Uganda do not how what opportunities are available to them. They make choices because they don't know or believe that they deserve better. A cycle of poverty and often abuse will trap these girls. Then become mothers and the cycle continues. Many girls do not think they deserve a better life, but we are going to change that view! With your help and support I will be able to change the lives of a few people. The thoughts and comments you have given to answer my questions will be helpful in developing my project!    

Join me in the adventure! To help me make a difference go to THIS Help International website and donate now! Be sure to specify that you are supporting Elaine Newton on her trip to Uganda! Plus any donation is tax deductible! Or visit my pledgie page! 

Thanks so much for your support and love in everything and stay tuned for more adventures! 

What comes to mind when you hear the word adventure?