Don't tell my Mom I wrote this blog...

I cannot talk about my development of my self-esteem without talking about my Mom. She is not a perfect person, but she is wonderful. She impacted myself in many ways.

What my Mom did that changed my life:

Ignored Me
She always made time to exercise and do things that she loved to do. I remember a group of women getting together in my living room and exercising to Jane Fonda (really great outfits in those videos). She also would go to the gym to exercise and would leave me in the day care. I didn't always want to go, but she just let me whine and did it anyway. After a while I made friends and I still have friends from that day care.

Showed her love
Sometimes we feel silly when we constantly express our love to people. Let me give you an example of a conversation I had with Trevor yesterday.

Now it is true, it was totally random. But that is okay! My Mother always told me that she loved me. This is the single most defining thing in my life. I don't want to shock anyone, but I am over weight...hopefully you are all still conscious.  I have been for most of my life and sometimes kids are just plan mean. I got teased and picked on in school. I knew that the world equated thinness with beauty. I struggled to understand where I fit into this world of ours, but I always knew that my Mother loved me. I knew that she would love me even if the world didn't love me. I knew she would love me even if I didn't love myself. She helped me to see my own value as well as the value of those around me. She pointed out the good in others, which eventually helped me see how hard we are to ourselves.

Pushed Me
I remember one time I came down stairs and asked my Mother for a list of my weaknesses. Hahahahahahahahaha hahahahaha
I wanted to improve myself, but I couldn't think of anything. hahahahahaha
My Mom made a list! She did! She was honest, not harsh. She was forthright and told me the things that I could improve. After she gave me the list she told me a few things that I was doing well. She encouraged me, but she didn't baby me.

Believed in Me
To this day, my Mom is my #1 fan. She always encourages me to reach for the stars. Seriously, if I called her today and said I wanted to go to space she would find a way to help me do it. She always thought that I could do anything that I wanted to do. So I have done alot of things that I wouldn't have believed I could do. She supported me in my desires and really cared about things happening in my life.

Taught Me to be Strong
My Mom comes from a line of strong women and she was determined to continue the tradition. She told me fabulous stories about the strong women in our family. She taught me not to be easily offended. She taught me to work hard and to play hard. She taught me to find something to smile about even when everything goes wrong. She taught me to walk out my anger or punch a pillow (still used to this day). She taught me that love and kindness are strengths. She taught me to accept criticism.

Now I don't like to put people on pedestals, because I know it is uncomfortable up there. I am not perfect ( I could tell you stories...oh wait I already have), my parents aren't perfect, nor is anyone perfect. My Mom did her best to love me and encourage me to love myself and others. She had no way of knowing that I would become obsessed with self-esteem. She only did her finest to teach me how to navigate this crazy world.

Think back. Who ignored you, loved you, pushed you, and believed in you? Tell those people that made you strong, thank you.

Do you take time for yourself, love yourself, push yourself, and believe in yourself?
-This week do something for yourself: take a bath, paint your nails, go for a walk, or be creative.
-Push yourself to get out of your comfort zone: smile at a random stranger, apply for a job you don't think you will get, or make a new friend.

Thank you to all those who loved me, pushed me, ignored me, and believed in me. Thank you to all the strong women who have been examples to me. Thank you Mom!